12/3. “I Want Stage Time” @ 222 Hyde.  SF. $10 (Discount Below). Sign-Ups: 7:30PM. Show: 8PM. Featuring Yayne Abeba. Hosted by Juan Medina. Overview: A weekly  competition that awards MORE stage time. More Explained Below:

Hello, comics ! Are you looking for stage time that GETS you more  STAGE  TIME ? Then look no further than this Saturday at the Comedy  Cellar ! 4  people will be selected by lottery to compete in the comedic  gauntlet  known as “I WANT STAGE TIME !” w/ your host Juan Medina
Prize: A set redeemable at Set, Up Punch! operated shows.
Show starts at 8pm sharp, you must be there BEFORE 7:30 to put your  name  in the draw. Rules are simple: Show up, you get to put your name  in  once. Buy a pizza or a beer, you get to put your name again. You  even  get an extra name in the draw for the NEXT WEEK if you watch the  whole  show ! It’s the show where you get rewarded for not acting like  an  asshole
AUDIENCE! Show is 10 dollars, but it’s $5 when you mention Courting Comedy or Retweet “I love the comedy cellar” from “@ThatsTheJuan” on twitter.

12/3. “I Want Stage Time” @ 222 Hyde. SF. $10 (Discount Below). Sign-Ups: 7:30PM. Show: 8PM. Featuring Yayne Abeba. Hosted by Juan Medina. Overview: A weekly competition that awards MORE stage time. More Explained Below:

Hello, comics ! Are you looking for stage time that GETS you more STAGE TIME ? Then look no further than this Saturday at the Comedy Cellar ! 4 people will be selected by lottery to compete in the comedic gauntlet known as “I WANT STAGE TIME !” w/ your host Juan Medina

Prize: A set redeemable at Set, Up Punch! operated shows.

Show starts at 8pm sharp, you must be there BEFORE 7:30 to put your name in the draw. Rules are simple: Show up, you get to put your name in once. Buy a pizza or a beer, you get to put your name again. You even get an extra name in the draw for the NEXT WEEK if you watch the whole show ! It’s the show where you get rewarded for not acting like an asshole

AUDIENCE! Show is 10 dollars, but it’s $5 when you mention Courting Comedy or Retweet “I love the comedy cellar” from “@ThatsTheJuan” on twitter.

11/19. NEW SHOW: “I Want Stage Time” @ 222 Hyde. SF. $10 (Discount Below). Sign-Ups: 7:30PM. Show: 8PM. Featuring Miles K and a Secret Headliner. Hosted by Juan Medina. Overview: A weekly competition that awards MORE stage time. More Explained Below:

Hello, comics ! Are you looking for stage time that GETS you more STAGE  TIME ? Then look no further than this Saturday at the Comedy Cellar ! 4  people will be selected by lottery to compete in the comedic gauntlet  known as “I WANT STAGE TIME !” w/ your host Juan Medina
Prize: A set redeemable at Set, Up Punch! operated shows.
Show starts at 8pm sharp, you must be there BEFORE 7:30 to put your name  in the draw. Rules are simple: Show up, you get to put your name in  once. Buy a pizza or a beer, you get to put your name again. You even  get an extra name in the draw for the NEXT WEEK if you watch the whole  show ! It’s the show where you get rewarded for not acting like an  asshole
AUDIENCE! Show is 10 dollars, but it’s $5 when you mention Courting Comedy or Retweet “I love the comedy cellar” from “@ThatsTheJuan" on twitter.

11/19. NEW SHOW: “I Want Stage Time” @ 222 Hyde. SF. $10 (Discount Below). Sign-Ups: 7:30PM. Show: 8PM. Featuring Miles K and a Secret Headliner. Hosted by Juan Medina. Overview: A weekly competition that awards MORE stage time. More Explained Below:

Hello, comics ! Are you looking for stage time that GETS you more STAGE TIME ? Then look no further than this Saturday at the Comedy Cellar ! 4 people will be selected by lottery to compete in the comedic gauntlet known as “I WANT STAGE TIME !” w/ your host Juan Medina

Prize: A set redeemable at Set, Up Punch! operated shows.

Show starts at 8pm sharp, you must be there BEFORE 7:30 to put your name in the draw. Rules are simple: Show up, you get to put your name in once. Buy a pizza or a beer, you get to put your name again. You even get an extra name in the draw for the NEXT WEEK if you watch the whole show ! It’s the show where you get rewarded for not acting like an asshole

AUDIENCE! Show is 10 dollars, but it’s $5 when you mention Courting Comedy or Retweet “I love the comedy cellar” from “@ThatsTheJuan" on twitter.

"It’s like a weight loss commercial where I’m perpetual the before picture"

— Jackie Keliiaa on having a smaller twin [Paraphrase]

"The Olsen Twins are all skinny and wearing scarves, they look like an Aerosmith mic stand."

— Vince Mancini [Paraphrase]

"All families have a black sheep in their family. I’m the praying mantis of mine."

— John Hoogasian [Paraphrase]

"As a black man from Oakland, I have to say, gay sex without condoms is the most gangster thing ever."

— Lyall Behrens @ Comedy Cellar [Paraphrase]

"If you know people that go to church all the time and have a dirty bathroom, don’t trust them."

— Sergio Barajas [Paraphrase]

Thai Rivera

[I saw this guy at the Comedy Cellar last night. Very down-to-earth on stage, very relatable. I instantly became a fan.]

Thursday Comedy News (7/21/2011)

Scott Capurro @punchlinesf . 444 Battery St. SF. 8 PM. $15. Featuring Sherry Sirof.

Comedy & Cocktails @ The Purple Onion. 140 Columbus Ave. SF. 8 pm. Free. Featuring headliner Kevin Camia, Katie Compa, Sam Davidoff, Danny Dechi, Joe Gorman, Liz Grant and more…

Toolbox’s Tran-drogyny (Comedy&Burlesque) @ Club 93. 93 9th St. SF. Featuring David Hawkins and Anna Seregina.

Wharf Room Comedy @ Castagnola’s. 286 Jefferson St. SF. 8 PM. Featuring Chantel Williams, Rich Dreyling, Jules Posner, Greg Asdourian, Arnie Ponce and more…

The Historic Brainwash Open Mic. 1122 Folsom St. SF. Sign Ups: 6:30. Show: 7-11ish. Hosted by the Legendary Tony Sparks.

San Francisco Comedy Cellar Open Mic. 222 Hyde St. SF. 20 5-Minute Spots via Lottery. 6:30 PM Drawing. 7:00 PM Show. Full Bar + Pizza. Brought to you by Set Up, Punch.

San Francisco Comedy Cellar Open Mic. 222 Hyde St. SF. 20 5-Minute Spots via Lottery. 6:30 PM Drawing. 7:00 PM Show. Full Bar + Pizza. Brought to you by Set Up, Punch.

Saturday Comedy Shows (5/28/2011)

Big Damn Productions @ Kip’s. 2439 Durant Ave. Berkeley. $10. 8 PM. Featuring Daryus Monday, Stuart Thompson, Roman Leo, Chris Riggins and more. Hosted by Dash Kwiatkowski. [Next wave of headliners on this show.]

Jabari Davis and Associates @ The Purple Onion. 140 Columbus Ave. SF. $20. 8 PM. Featuring Marco Antonio Alvarez, Jon Fink, Melanie O’Brien, DC Ervin, Angela Marie and headliner G. King. Hosted by Tony Sparks. [Bananas Part 1]

Jabari Davis and Associates @ The Purple Onion. 140 Columbus Ave. SF. $20. 8 PM. Featuring Andrew Roberts, Shanti Charan, Angela Marie, Nic Flair, G. King, and headliner DC Ervin. Hosted by Tony Sparks [Bananas Part 2].

800 Larkin Open Mic. Buy a Drink, Tell Some Jokes. 6 PM. Hosted by Chris Schiappacasse

Wharf Room Comedy @ Castagnola’s. 286 Jefferson St. SF. 8 PM. Featuring Chantel Williams, Dave DeLuca, Ben Feldman, Duat Mai, Jeff Reitman, and more. [Seal of Approval]

Joe Klocek @ The Comedy Cellar. 222 Hyde St. SF. $10. 8 PM. Also featuring John Ross and Frankie Quiñones. [2011 SF Weekly’s Best Comedian]

Nick Griffin @ The Punch Line. 444 Battery St. SF. Two Shows: 8 & 10 PM. $21. Featuring Geoff Tate. Hosted by Caitlin Gill.

Tracy Morgan @ Cobb’s Comedy Club. 915 Columbus Ave. SF. Two Shows: 8 & 10 PM. $44.