"There’s no more history on the History Channel; it’s all “Pawn Stars” and “Storage Nonsense”. It used to be a bunch of Hitler showers, but they don’t do that anymore, and somehow, now, it’s worse."
— David Nguyen @ Stork Club/Storking Comedy [Paraphrase]
"I’m not going to do well on purpose to get back at Josef for putting on this show."
— David Nguyen @ 222 Hyde [Paraphrase]
"You guys are going to decide if you want to laugh at my jokes. This ‘laugh three seconds later’ thing is throwing off my rhythm."
— David Nguyen