"I got a stepladder and it sucks. It’s not my biological ladder."

Dutch Savage @ Humbrews/S.H.I.Ts and Giggles Festival

"I got super high, went on Wikipedia, typed in “space” trying to figure some shit out."

Cornell Reid @ Humbrews/S.H.I.Ts and Giggles Festival [Paraphrase]

Matt Lieb and Audience in... Pretty Big

  • Matt Lieb: I may not be the funniest comic but I will be the tallest comic...
  • Audience Member: I don't know! That black guy [OJ Patterson] was pretty big!
"I fucked a ghost once."

— Ivy Vasquez’s parting words @ Humbrews/S.H.I.Ts and Giggles Festival.