"They that sex is a drug, which makes sense because I have/would/will totally suck dick for it."
— Allison Mick @ Stork Club/Storking Comedy [Paraphrase]
Caitlin Gill being hilarious at Storking Comedy/Stork Club
"Every time I put on make-up I can’t help but feeling like a Lost Boy getting ready to attack Captain Hook"
— Aly Jones @ Stork Club/Storking Comedy [Paraphrase]
"There’s no more history on the History Channel; it’s all “Pawn Stars” and “Storage Nonsense”. It used to be a bunch of Hitler showers, but they don’t do that anymore, and somehow, now, it’s worse."
— David Nguyen @ Stork Club/Storking Comedy [Paraphrase]
"If you wanna rob a muthafucka, you should first refer back to the “Hierarchy of Muthafuckas”. If you got a gun, you’re on the top of that list. And then it’s mid-range weapons, like a pole, a muthafucka with ninja stars. And then it’s athletic muthafuckas. And then it’s a big, black muthafucka and I rule everything under that shit!"
— Brandon Stokes on why he shouldn’t be targeted by crackheads for robbery @ Stork Club/Storking Comedy [Paraphrase]
![“The only thing a white person is good for is losing money and getting it back.”
- Mean Dave on the perils of Anglo slavery @ Stork Club/Storking Comedy [Paraphrase]](http://24.media.tumblr.com/c0a02420ab34dfb5d2b754c08071f686/tumblr_mi30qgPepc1qcxc43o1_500.jpg)
"Unlike humans, guinea pigs have nothing to experiment on."
— Rolly Moe @ Stork Club/Storking Comedy [Paraphrase]
![“My fat is so gay that I have rainbow stretch marks”
- Keon Kobra @ Stork Club [Paraphrase]
[Photo by Shawn Robbins]](http://24.media.tumblr.com/dd7f8a16a1ff2ef6d623f7d123dc3568/tumblr_mhm6xvsTcU1qcxc43o1_500.jpg)
