4/18. The Business: “The Maximilian Affair” @ Dark Room Theater. 2263 Mission St. SF. 8PM. $5. Featuring Frankie Quinoñes and Clara Bijl. Residents: Sean Keane, Caitlin Gill, Chris Garcia, Bucky Sinister and Chris Thayer. 

This week, The Business regulars are stuffing your enchiladas with baguettes as we welcome a bill of guests that would have Napoleon III plieing in his grave hard enough to knock off the sugar skulls. 

Clara Bijl is visiting us from The City of Angels, but was born in The City of Light. PARIS, FRANCE. She was raised in the Alps, attended schools in Germany, Switzerland, and South Carolina; then one day, she moved to The City that Never Sleeps to begin a career in stand-up comedy. Performing all around the Big Apple and the rest of the country, she became a prolific writer of cutting, witty, internationally flavored comedy.

She will truffle your butter.

Frankie Quinones is a rising star to search for and catch. He is a founding member of For The People Comedy, is a collective of artists who share a common goal of producing colorful events fueled by positivity and laughter. Always maintaining a diverse lineup to represent San Francisco culture through high energy shows filled with humor and music. Frankie has also toured with some of the industry’s top headliners including the legendary Paul Rodriguez, and has performed for our troops overseas in Japan, Europe, and the Middle East.

He is also quite dapper. Muy rico suave. 

This show is gonna feel like French kissing a churro. It’s gonna be like peeping on the Dos Equis guy with a French maid. It’s gonna make you wanna escarGO(silentT) see more live comedy!!! EIYIYI!!!! (I’m sorry)

Grab $5, your burrito and your beret and come join our fantastic guests and all the regulars! (except Alex, who we wish well in the wilds of the Northwest. If you are reading this in Tacoma, Washington- go see his shows this weekend at the Comedy Underground!)

Courting Bridgetown: “San Francisco” by Dan Dion.

[Top: Clare O’Kane, Chris Garcia, Alex Koll, Brent Weinbach

Bottom: Matt Morales, Janine Brito, David Gborie, Nato Green and Ivan Hernandez]

3/23. Mikey Walz @ Purple Onion. 140 Columbus Ave. SF. 10PM. $20. Featuring Andrea Almario, Sam Davidoff, Melanie O’Brien, Chris Garcia and special guest Lilybeth Helson. Hosted by Jabari Davis. Tickets Available: Here. 

4/1. April Fools Show/Party @ Vitus. 201 Broadway St. Oakland. 8PM. $10. Featuring David Gborie, Alison Stevenson, Caitlin Gill and Chris Garcia. Musical Guest: DJ REAL. Hosted by Clare O’Kane. Presented by Sylvan Productions.

3/14. The Business @ The Dark Room. 2263 Mission St. SF. 8PM. $5. Featuring Josh Gondelman, Emily Fleming, Kaseem Bentley, Sean Keane, Alex Koll, Chris Garcia, Chris Thayer, Caitlin Gill, and Bucky Sinister

The Business is happy to welcome the hilarious Josh Gondelman to the show this week. Josh hails from Boston, but currently lives in New York City. For such a sweet and lovable former preschool teacher, he knows a surprising amount about gangsta rap. He won first prize in the initial Laughing Skull Comedy Festival in Atlanta, and has performed at festivals such as SF Sketchfest, Laugh Your Asheville Off, and the Eugene Mirman Comedy Festival. His debut CD is called “Everything’s The Best,” and was produced by Rooftop Comedy. You can follow his consistently stellar Twitter work at twitter.com/joshgondelman.

As if that weren’t enough East Coast flavor, we’ve also got comedian Emily Fleming visiting from New York. And we’re also happy to welcome back Kaseem Bentley, local favorite and insult comic extraordinaire. The San Jose Mercury News called him a “comic to watch,” and Chris Garcia once called him “the last King of Scotland.” You’ll call him “hella funny” or possibly “Rick Ross’s half-brother.”

We’ve also got a full cast of regular Businesspeople: Chris Garcia, Caitlin Gill, Sean Keane, Alex Koll, Bucky Sinister & Chris Thayer. As always, admission is just five dollars, because we’re the best bargain in town. 

3/3. Live Comedy @ SPARC. 1256 Mission St. SF. 5PM. Free (RSVP). Featuring Sean Keane, Chris Garcia, Frankie Quiñones, Melanie O’Brien, Ivan Hernandez, Lydia Popovich, and Sam Davidoff. Hosted by Andrew Holmgren. RSVP: Here. 

Favorite Things of Last Night: Chris Garcia @ E.J. Phair

2/28. They’re All Gonna Laugh At You @ ERA Art Lounge. 19 Grand Ave. Oakland. 8PM. $5. Featuring Miles K., Lydia Popovich, and Chris Garcia. Music By. Bugs in Costume. Hosted by The Front Row.