"A [full head of hair] is ‘male cleavage’. Do you see all these sad, bald fucks?"

- Brendan Lynch @ San Francisco Punch Line [Paraphrase]
[Photo by Leo Hochberg]

"A [full head of hair] is ‘male cleavage’. Do you see all these sad, bald fucks?"

- Brendan Lynch @ San Francisco Punch Line [Paraphrase]

[Photo by Leo Hochberg]

courtingcomedy:

9/19. Todd Barry Crowd Work Tour 2 @ The Chapel. 777 Valencia St. SF. 8pm. $20.
[An event in summation: Genius comic tows the line of the artform’s most unnatural, spontaneous, and ominous aspects—crowd work. The Chapel is beautiful, often proving itself viable for the one-off, unparalleled comedy experiences outside of the grasp of LiveNation. This event should continue the lineage quite nicely.]

courtingcomedy:

9/19. Todd Barry Crowd Work Tour 2 @ The Chapel. 777 Valencia St. SF. 8pm. $20.

[An event in summation: Genius comic tows the line of the artform’s most unnatural, spontaneous, and ominous aspects—crowd work. The Chapel is beautiful, often proving itself viable for the one-off, unparalleled comedy experiences outside of the grasp of LiveNation. This event should continue the lineage quite nicely.]

"I’m not saying that Jeff Ross is gay, I’m reiterating."

— Bob Saget roasting Jeff Ross @ The Barbary/Outside Lands Festival [Paraphrase]

"I’m from Santa Cruz… I guess I surfed here on a blunt. Fuck Santa Cruz!"

Tyler Hinz contention on being introduced from Santa Cruz @ San Francisco Punch Line [Paraphrase]


"I’m sorry I had to interrupt your conversation about Ugg boots and not shaking hands with black people."

- Josh Argyle at a group of loud, waspy hecklers @ Dirty Trix Saloon [Paraphrase]

"I’m sorry I had to interrupt your conversation about Ugg boots and not shaking hands with black people."

- Josh Argyle at a group of loud, waspy hecklers @ Dirty Trix Saloon [Paraphrase]

"I love you OJ, but you’re a false positive."

Chris Barylick on “the OJ laugh” @ Kingman’s Ivy Room [Paraphrase]

"Keep it pronoun neutral, that’s how you do crowd work in San Francisco."

Brendan Lynch @ San Francisco Punch Line [Paraphrase]

"Once you “jizz on my face” the laughter is spent."

Barry Sobel's sage “witty before dirty” comedy advice @ San Francisco Punch Line. 

"I can’t have babies, don’t let my accent fool you. In my culture, this [motions to vagina] shuts down when you get a degree."

— Eloisa Bravo @ San Francisco Punch Line [Paraphrase]


"Fuck the haters! I’m cute! … Earlier today I was in my girlfriend’s kitch wearing only a crown. #i #am #cute!"

- Josh Androsky @ Good Bellies [Paraphrase]
[Photo by Jennifer Berge, and to properly read the quote, you have to replace the #’s with the word “hashtag”]

"Fuck the haters! I’m cute! … Earlier today I was in my girlfriend’s kitch wearing only a crown. #i #am #cute!"

- Josh Androsky @ Good Bellies [Paraphrase]

[Photo by Jennifer Berge, and to properly read the quote, you have to replace the #’s with the word “hashtag”]