The Rundown Thursday August 7 2014
All your #SanFrancisco #BayArea #standup #comedy #shows & #openmics.News
Tonight is the Thursday premiere of Clay Newman’s Comedy Jam at Milk Bar. The show will run weekly as comedy expands to three days a week at Milk!Tonight’s Top Picks
San Francisco: Rock & Roll Comedy JamShows
Music from Medicine Bug (WATCH CLIP), The Arabs, Rubberneck Lions, Blue Moment
Comedy Headliner EJ Allen (WATCH CLIP), Jabari Davis, Andrew Homgren, Papp Johnson, Rajeev Dhar, the Affirmative Action Heroes, & host Clay Newman @ Milk Bar 1840 Haight St (Haight) 8:00 FREE!
Oakland: Tourettes without Regrets
Variety show featuring comedy from Sammy Obeid (WATCH CLIP), as well as comedians Kelly Anneken & Johan Miranda battling it out in the dirty haiku competition @ Oakland Metro Operahouse 630 3rd Street Oakland 8:30 $10
Peninsula: Comedy Sharks @ Hop Dogma Brewing Co
Headliner Scott Simpson (WEBSITE), Red Scott, Kaseem Bentley, Anthony Medina, Vincent Chuang, & host Phil Griffiths @ 30 Avenue Portola Suite 1B Half Moon Bay 7:30 FREE!
New Talent Showcase @ The Purple Onion at Kell’s 530 Jackson St (North Beach) 7:00 $5 (1 drink min)
Rock & Roll Comedy Jam (WATCH CLIP) Headliner EJ Allen (WATCH CLIP) @ Milk Bar 1840 Haight St (Haight) 8:00 FREE!
The Mission Position Headliner Aparna Nancherla (WATCH CLIP) @ Lost Weekend Video 1034 Valencia (Mission) 8:00 $10
Purple Onion All Stars @ The Purple Onion at Kell’s 530 Jackson St (North Beach) 8:15 $5 (1 drink min)
Comet Club Comedy @ 3111 Fillmore (Marina) 8:30 FREE
Nightlife on Mars Headliner Matt Morales (WATCH CLIP) @ Murphy’s Pub 217 Kearny St (Financial) 8:30 FREE
The Later Show @ The Purple Onion at Kell’s 530 Jackson St (North Beach) 10:00 $5 (1 drink min)
Baron Vaughn (WATCH CLIP) @ Punch Line 444 Battery (Financial) 8:00 $16 (2 drink min)
Jim Norton (WATCH CLIP) @ Cobb’s 915 Columbus (Russian Hill) 8:00 $23 (2 drink min)
Free Stand Up Comedy @ Sanctuary Ultra Lounge 2339 1st St Livermore 7:30-9:00 FREE!
Storking Comedy: Fiorentini! Headliner Francesca Fiorentini (WATCH CLIP) @ Stork Club 2330 Telegraph Oakland 7:45 FREE
Oakland Comedy Headliner Jeff Applebaum (WATCH CLIP) @ The Washington Inn 495 10th St Oakland 8:00 $10
Funny Fun at Club 21 Headliner Ronn Vigh (WATCH CLIP) @ 2111 Franklin St Oakland 8:00 $10
Pat G Presents Churchward Comedy Headliner Sammy Obeid (WATCH CLIP) @ Churchward Pub 1515 Park St Alameda 8:00 $10
Tourettes without Regrets featuring Sammy Obeid (WATCH CLIP) @ Oakland Metro Operahouse 630 3rd Street Oakland 8:30 $10
Comedy Night @ Stars 155 Browns Valley Parkway Vacaville 9:00 FREE!
Luenell (WATCH CLIP) @ Tommy T’s 5104 Hopyard Rd Pleasanton 7:30 $15-$25 (2 item min)
The Blue Lagoonies Comedy Night @ 923 Pacific Ave Santa Cruz 8:30 Free
Nick Griffin (WATCH CLIP) @ Rooster T Feathers 157 W. El Camino Real Sunnyvale 8:00 $13 (2 item min)
Studebaker & Friends Headliner David Studebaker (WATCH CLIP) @ San Jose Improv 62 S. 2nd St San Jose 8:00 $12 (2 item min)
North BayOpen Mics
Brainwash @ 1122 Folsom St (SoMa) 6:00/7:00-10:00
Thursday Night Comedy @ Glaze Teriyaki Grill 1946 Fillmore (Pacific Heights) 9:30 sign-up/10:00
Joe Gorman & Zack Chapaloni
Free Word Happenings @ 16th & Mission (outdoor/mixed) 10:00ish-12:00ish
Storking Comedy @ Stork Club 2330 Telegraph Oakland 5:00 Sign-up for 5:15 lottery/5:15-7:45
Sharade Lounge @ 25144 Mission Blvd Hayward 9:00 sign-up/9:30-1:30
The Comedy Workout Room @ Stars 155 Browns Valley Parkway Vacaville 8:00-9:00
Canvas Open Mic @ Sunnyvale Art Gallery 251 West El Camino Real Sunnyvale 7:00 sign-up/8:00-11:00 Ten Minutes
Cito.FAME.Us (mixed/clean) @ Iguana 330 S 3rd St San Jose 8:30/9:00-11:00
Belrose Theatre (mixed) @ 1415 5th Ave San Rafael 8:00 $5 fee
8/8 Daymon Ferguson Album Release Party @ Purple Onion SF
8/27 Marga Gomez Commonwealth Club Interview
9/6 Chris Tucker Paramount Theatre Oakland
9/11-10/11 39th Annual San Francisco Comedy Competion
9/12 Funny or Die Oddball Comedy Fest Mountain View
9/14 34th Annual Comedy Day San Francisco
9/26 Cheech & Chong Santa Rosa
9/26 Dana Carvey Santa Rosa
See something I missed? Want to make sure your show is listed?
I had played the Rite Spot the week before. I did terribly. I tried to work “new” jokes to a sleepy, sparse audience. The next comedian, super smooth Gary Anderson, had the set of the night. I felt horrible.
Good thing I had a contingency show. My farewell show.
Comedy years are like dog years. After six months you feel like pro, after two years you feel grizzled. That grizzle refreshes. It’s a license to complain, to spat, to tell tired jokes, to side-eye newbies and hope-eye clouted colleagues. You can burn yourself out on that. Not me. I went bonkers. I was ubiquitous. I was jubilant. A sprinting, spewing, evangelizing, all-encompassing embodiment of my absolute desire.
Like all great things, something changed. A lot of things changed. Hard comedy living was my post-collegial grad school (where I basically did all the things I should have done as an undergrad). I laugh at the idea of “maturing” through the most juvenile time in my life, but I did. In the midst of growing, I felt a shift, a push. I fell in love. I dove. I cannonballed.
I don’t know who I am anymore. When you elect to lose yourself in somebody, you indeed, by my experience, lose yourself. It’s amazing.
It’s also frightening. My identity as a comedian was forged longer and spoke truer than any other ideology in my life. After a while I became less and less (less mics, less supporters), changed more and more (new job, new apartment) and then, BOOM: I’m not the comedian I want to be, not the comedian that puts in the work, not the comedian touring on planes, trains and automobiles, not the comedian hanging in the back, hanging at the bar, hanging at the house party, not the comedian producing shows, or hosting mics, not the comedian spreading the most accurate information (shouts to Matt Gubser). Most of the aesthetics I covet as a comedian requires a lifestyle I no longer have (or, arguably, no longer need). So, in order to claim my chaos, to protest my irrelevancy, to break the cycle of weekend warrior compromise, I said goodbye.
I quit comedy on July 7th 2014. It is liberating. I love telling people that I quit. It bums a lot of fellow comedians out. I love seeing them squirm at a maniacal reflection of their creative mortality. No, I will not covet your stage time! No, I will not do your show! No, I will not cover for your mic! No, I will not roast you! No, I will not be rejected by your comedy club or your festival or whatever else inspires semiprofessional jealousy. No, I will not be the characteristic laugh during the awkward folly! I will not! I will not! I will not! I’m dead!
Three things makes “quitting” the funniest thing in the world. One, fuck me, right? Who gives a shit—in a macro sense—about San Francisco comedy as a lifestyle. Two, in comedy, you HAVE to quit. Most people fade out, few make a show of, and those who do are (usually) using a false finish as a promotional stunt (shouts to Justin Scales). Three, it’s a legitimate satire. The great times were good, but the good times weren’t that great. Comedy is self-righteous suicide. I killed myself thrice over to chase the dream, but, in a city with little industry, having no transportation, little capital and less business sense, I got as far as I could professionally/financially. Maybe that’s good enough.
I’m committed to this. I’m prepared to be the Sammy Obeid of burying my talents in the backyard. 1001 Days of Tragedy. Still, I miss it; miss more than the stage, or the rush, or the definition. Comedians are my family, my tribe. They speak my language, I’m understood. Maybe I should get therapy, do yoga, start a hobby. Maybe I should find a balance, figure out a cure for my innate tunnel vision. Maybe you’ll see me around, maybe not, maybe later, maybe tomorrow.